Success Unbound

This blog is brought to you by Sylver.

Now that I’ve had some time to clear my head and not have every other thought be “I’M A FUCKING PUBLISHED AUTHOR! GAZE UPON MY WORK, YE MIGHTY, AND DESPAIR!”… I can write a proper blog about things.

Let’s start with being a self-published author. I went through BookBaby for all my eBook needs and will have “Lie” in every eBook retailer in the world in a month’s time. Some stores will have it days from now, others will have it in weeks. Two of the things I had to do was write a bio and summary. I don’t think I’ll ever enjoy those parts.

An aspect of being self-published, perhaps the largest aspect, is that I’m also self-promoting. There’re a few reasons I’m choosing to self-promote, because I don’t really have to. However, they’re just offshoots of two so I’ll explain them. One is that, sooner or later, agents and publicists cost money. Money I don’t have or want to spend. Particularly because although I’d rather not self-promote, I know how great a job I can do of something if properly motivated. Which brings me to the second thing. I’d much rather be the master of my own destiny than worry about being in the hands of someone else’s. A someone who’ll have other authors to deal with. However much effort they’ll put into me, they’ll still have a split focus. I won’t. Agents and publicists could do a better job of getting me noticed, but I’d rather have myself to blame with whatever good or bad comes my way. Besides: I’m an adult and this is a new world for all artists. I just have to put my boyish charm and social awkwardness to some use.

I’d debating creating a trailer. I’ve already recorded the voices for it, so it’d just be a matter of editing them together, scoring it, and creating visuals. Why wouldn’t I do it? I started thinking that it might be superfluous, but I’ll probably change my mind by Monday.

I’ve been reading a lot about marketing eBooks and have a solid plan. One site said that it’s a shame I’m thinking about it now vs. while I was writing. Because I could’ve skewed my novel toward a particular demographic. That bullshit’s one of the reasons why entertainment is so horrible now. You can’t cater to people while you create and still create something wholly truthful. One of the best periods of cinema is the 1970s because artists were allowed to work without worrying about four quadrants. At the same time, I understand that I have to sell my novel. And I’ll do a damn good job of it. But “Lie” stays as it is. While writing, my novel is art. While selling, my novel’s a product.

Artistic success is probably the greatest high anyone can achieve. All I’ve done is finished a novel and managed to get it in stores, and I already feel like I can flip mountains. I can’t imagine how tolerable I’ll be after I sell my first copy. Which leads me to that a-word: arrogance. I’m not the modest guy I was two years ago. I mean, I’m still modest but I have the added weight of accomplishing something few have done and being my only cheerleader during the process. There’re so many people who say they’re gonna do something, I’ve known some, and others who’ve allowed themselves to become distracted by whatever excuse, and I’ve also known them. It also doesn’t help/hurt my ego that I’m the first person I know who’s taken such a large creative step. Or that so many great things are happening to me now. Next week, I get to see the most famous living burlesque dancer do her thing along with “Pacific Rim”. Later this month, I have the club experience I’ve always wanted (hopefully). Next month, I get to see one of my all-time favorite bands live (and I hate live shows so that should tell you how excited I am). The month after, I celebrate being a professional artist before my next birthday along with hearing Nine Inch Nails’ latest album. The month after that, I get to see Freddy Krueger present films three nights in a row. In November, I see the culmination of my entire summer of ’12 and 50 years of sci-fi with the 50th anniversary special of “Doctor Who”. In December, more Middle-earth fun. All the while, I’ll be earning my fandom and enjoying whatever benefits come from doing that. It’s so easy to get lost in the air up there. So I remind myself that I’m lucky I’m able to live off being creative. That I’m humble first and cocky second… which becomes a strange playful arrogance. Ladies like guys who can stand up for themselves and fall out of chairs.

Although writing is the means, not the end, I feel that I have to keep that wheel greased. I’ve spent most of the year writing but I didn’t have anything to show for it until around now. And I enjoyed writing weekly short stories. Part of the problem was that I couldn’t juggle two creative ideas at the same time. The other problem was that ideas outside of “Lie” stopped coming. That hasn’t been the case for the past few weeks, however. I have a notebook dedicated to ideas and I’ve filled far more pages than I thought I would’ve by now. I was worried though, because I had films in mind for them… but there’re far too many to do well in a lifetime. However, they’d make great short stories. And songs.


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